Jordan Mentz

I have been trying for so long to find something that was missing
Then I realized I had already found it, but didn’t know it
Having to struggle through the days,
that formed a shattered past
Thinking that something was missing
Knowing there needed to be something to fill the void I felt
Looking at the cards, wanting something else dealt
I am slowly beginning to understand what it means to seek you
Even though I already found you, you still are pursuing me
Even when I close my eyes and fall asleep at night
Trying to imagine where I would be at the end of the day
I can’t comprehend the treasure that I have in you
I don’t know the words you speak to me all the time,
All I know is that you love me, you spelled it out on Calvary
Wrote it upon creation, and penned it in my heart
Trying to explain the way that I feel about this joy
Like a cat reaching for a toy
Seems so many times that it’s just out of my hands
So I take my life and place it in yours
Hidden from others, because I am hiding in you
Trying to find in my own strength the power to carry on
I keep trying to find what I already have
Knowing that you’re never stop pursuing me and wanting me to come to you
Not knowing how deep the love is you have for me
Open up my eyes and allow me to see the beauty you’ve placed inside
Hidden within the heart for your people wanting to let the world know

I must admit that I’ve been tryin’ so hard to make ends meet
Sometimes I think I can live this life the I want
and it leaves me on my face, right back where I started
Whatever happened to me trusting you to put my life together

Where did I turn away from you, and seem to ignore the voice inside
I’ve been tryin so long on my own, but now I accept the love and grace you’ve offered
Trusting you to bring me home, a place where there are no distractions
A place of treasure no one can replace, and a place where I’ve found you

When I am tryin’ to trust watchin’ this world’s possesions turn to rust
Wanting to grab a hold of something that would never be taken away
Give me the faith to keep on trusting
Give me the eyes to keep on seeing beyond what I can imagine

I want to give you my heart and let you transform me
I am tired of the world trying to conform me and leaving me broken
Looking around seeing nothing to live for, but you are the only one
who can end this never-ending cycle with your hope and love.

I really can’t stand not knowing
The way you feel about me
The way I look at you not knowing exactly what to do with myself
Trying to comprehend the song playin’ in my heart when I am with you

Each time I see you smile, my heart skips a beat and I feel like my eyes are playing tricks on me
Then I realized that it wasn’t my eyes that were playin with my mind
A girl like you someone like me would be lucky to find
Such a beautiful creation standing before me looking at your pretty eyes

Sometimes it seems too good to be true, just thinking of you gives me fuzzy feelings
Can’t stand the quandry I find myself in at times because I am overflowing
I don’t know if you feel the same or if you’re just playin’ another silly game
Messin’ with my emotions, trying to play hard to get just to leave me feeling worse

I don’t want to be hurt again, but find myself getting up time after time
Down on my knees, prayin’ that I’ll find somebody
Tryin’ to hide the real me, because I don’t know if I can trust anyone anymore
Been hurt so deep but wanting a fresh start, so many thoughts are flooding my finite mind.

Trying to fit everything…into my world of make-believe…
Nothing to show for…without having it all in place…
It would seem to me…that my worries would be over…
If I could make it all up…trying to hide within my own little reality…
Faster than a bullet…penetrating my little secret…I can’t remain in make-believe…
When reality strikes me…it feels like a ton of bricks…waking me up from a fairy-tale dream…
trying to wish it all away…just trying to find another way to cope…

Sleeping soundly…in my father’s arms…the only thing I feel…
Is the warmth of my savior’s hands…as I rest and think about…
The time when nothing else matters…In a world so amazing…
You can try to imagine a life without pain…but it would be make believe…on this side of eternity…

Make believe my heart is breaking…make believe I could make it better on my own…
Trying to get things…done on my own…falling on my face…you gently bring me to my knees…
I want something…more than this world has to offer…
Trying to break out of my little…land of make-believe…when will I realize…
Making things up doesn’t make them come to pass…but I knew better than to bring others in…
My make-believe world is falling apart…because I am missing the one true Creator…
Faith in my maker to make things come to pass…there have been so many times…
I wanted to be in control of my own life…and when I worried…
I was living in the illusion…that I was in control…