Jordan Mentz

If I told you exactly how I was feeling…chances are that I would not make it through it…
Without my eyes tearing up…and my body shaking, not knowing how to calm my nerves…
I didn’t want to tell you…because I was afraid that my words would hurt you…
I didn’t know how to tell you…that I went in to my shell…
Whenever I learn what it means to love…I also learn what it means to hurt…
The fear of getting rejected…the fear of being hurt…
The uncertainty that comes with…opening your heart up…

Will people hurt me…and if they will why would I want to be open…
Its been tough for me to describe…the emotions that I am feeling…
When I get tense…my body begins to shake…
There are times when I cry…feeling like my soul is being crushed…
Feeling as if my mind is racing…seeing my life go by in a see through casing…
There are times when I want to cry…but my pride gets in my way…
There are many things that happen…when I go into another mode…
I don’t understand them…but I know there is a God who does…

A battered shattered heart…I offer what remains…
I know its not much…but to you it means so much..

I feel alone in this world constantly searching for the real me…
Something to hide me is what I am given daily…
The real me is hidden because the real me is tender…
I don’t want people to think that I am weak…

There are so many times that I wonder…
Is the real me still there…
Is the real me still strong…
Don’t get me wrong…
It’s been way to long…
Since I was myself…

I have been doing a lot of things…
There are times that God has brought me back to the king of kings…
While I am busy searching…
This world is passing me by and pretending that I don’t matter…
This world doesn’t care just how much I am hurting

It tells me to remain in hiding…
Even if I see the truth unwinding…
I know that the real me is out there and worth me finding…

So many times I feel like letting go
So many times I feel like giving up
So many times I feel like no one knows what I am dealing with
So many times I feel] like there is no point in looking forward

Hold on to what you know is true
Hold on to what you believe
Hold on to me, and even though you have to let go
Hold on to my hand, and I will let you know God loves you for you

Holding on is the only option
Grasping for the arms of love you are looking for
If you really knew what it meant to be held
Would you hold on to what your heart beats for

Crying tears of joy
When it seems that you are holding on to nothing
I’ll be there to remind you, that Jesus keeps on holding on to you
When you need someone to talk to I will listen but ask Jesus to guide you.

Inspired by the song “Shoulder” by Building 429 off the album “Building 429″.

You know me
You know me by name
And I can hear you calling me
You have been faithful
And you have been gracious

You call me by name
You see everything I am
All my deepest hurts,
All my deepest pains
I place in your hands

As you gently lead me
I will follow, even though I cannot see
Faith has led me this far
And I know faith will carry me home

There have times, when I feel like giving up
Reaching for something and feeling your touch
I have found something that it worth giving up my life
I want to share your love Lord with the world.

I never thought…that people were touched by prayer…
going against everything…I had heard before…
I thought that the purpose of prayer…was to touch the heart of God…
tonight I realized it can touch…the heart of his people…

I am hanging on…
As I am trembling…
I felt a hand resting on my shoulder…
I felt as if a burden had been lifted…

Why didn’t I see prayer…this way before…
Knowing that it touches you…
Forgetting that God uses others…to touch me…
Hanging by a prayer…just knowing that you’re there…

Written because of the mystery man, in the cowboy hat that prayed for me.

Why do innocent babies have to be killed…in order to open up our eyes…
When my children ask me…how come mommy can choose…
I always thought brother had a right to live…but why couldn’t he embrace life…
There are times that I don’t understand…the way that God brings us to Him…

People trying to tell me that babies…aren’t people but only choices…
Why and where do people draw the line…People being ignorant of truth…
Will not draw this country closer to God…but lead us away from our roots…
So hard to write because it hurts so bad…but its because it hurts…

I wanted to live to tell my children…that life was a gift…
With the the way things panned out though…I have to tell them they are a choice…
I know there will be healing…for this land if we trust in Jesus…
But right now…I tear up because I see us straying further…

Written in response to the news Barak Obama was going to be our 44th President of theUSA.