Jordan Mentz

Some times there is so much that seems to leave me on my face
I wanted to stand strong, and pretend that life didn’t hurt
Tears filled my eyes, and the pain seems to get underneath this calloused skin
A love so refreshing and so rewarding, my tears of sorrow
Were washed away by the hope of tomorrow

Man doesn’t need to be alone
Man wasn’t made to live emotionless
Its ok to lose control, and let God rescue you
I can’t stand the stereotype a cage of toughness
surrounding so many men’s hearts

Have you been hurting
Trying to find God in the midst
Having a savior who cried for you
Because He loved me for me
On Calvary, on that lonely tree
Teach me what it means to cry

While I was trying to be all high and mighty
putting up the front nothing was gonna phase me
because i thought that would make me more a man
Then I realized that you cried on the day Lazarus died
and you cried while upon the cross and while in Gethsemane
I didn’t realize you loved me so much that you would cry and then die.

Inspired by the song Lose control by Audio Adrenaline

I run away and you pursue me with relentless affection
You have shown me what it means to love others
When people seem to hate the poor,
Turn the other way and don’t pay attention
I have hurt for others, but never the way you hurt for me
When I fall down and lose my footing
You pick me up and clean my wounds

You tell me that it will be ok, and you wipe the tears from my eyes
Putting a smile in my heart and I know that you love me
With the same relentless affection you show the poor in the spirit.
I tried to hide from you, but you came to find me
I was lost like a sheep with no one to lead me
A shepherd came looking, and wouldn’t stop looking until you found me

I have been trying to get by on my own but it left me hurting
I tried for a while but realized that I didn’t have the strength
This life has thrown me curves, and I didn’t want to continue to dodge them
I knew that sometime, I would get burned by the fire I was playing with
I wanted to come to you but I was too scared
Now asking myself why did it take me so long

Inspired by Rich Mullin’s off the album the Jesus Record, Man of no Reputation

I am sleeping so soundly
my head against my pillow
nothing on my mind, and it’s just me and my Lord
Looking at the ceiling, thinking of what I could’ve been
Trying to chase these feelings out of my mind so that I can sleep
I am twisting and turning, trying to get comfortable

Laying awake looking at the sky
Asking myself why did you have to die for a sinner such as I
Looking at the clock, telling me just 5 more minutes til I have to wake up
I want to hit the snooze, just one more time slip into my unconscious mind one last time
But something keeps whisperin’ whisperin’ my name, telling me to take on the day
Can’t really answer it, because I am half asleep but hearing it so crystal clear

I sit up, wake up, stand up, get up
Telling the voices in my head to shut up
Don’t ever realize that the voices in my mind, are of you Lord
I so many times, try to filter you out pretending you don’t exist
Do I ever really just let you speak to me, or do I always hear what I want you to say

Wake up from your unconscious state
Wanting to make a difference
Catching the people who fall asleep at the wheel
Watching them careen into nothing
Asking why didn’t I tell them to wake up

Inspired by Leeland

So many times there are things in this life that trip us up
Can’t see it coming, but somehow I know it will become an obstacle
Trying to gain our footing on something that is firm
Only to find out there were things that were keeping me from you

I keep on falling for things that aren’t of you
wanting to be held by the arms of this world
will only leave us more desperate looking for something more
Teach me what it means to fall for you into your perfect love

Can’t describe the joy inside when I am on something solid
No fear in slipping up, because I have been firmly grounded
I tried to find something but it was filled with imperfections
I wanted something that will hold me, and never let me go.

Inspired by Steven Potaczek falling during the concert at CCF on 2/23/08 at VU, at the end of the 30 hour famine.

I wanted to step out into the real world,
Explore this life on my own knowing that I may get lost,
For you have found me, when I couldn’t see where I was
I didn’t know you were looking

The world tries to feed me the lies,
that He will never you why would you matter
I didn’t know what true love was
Till I met you and you found me

To find you, I sent out a search party left the flock behind
You were the missing sheep, but I wanted you to know I missed you
I wanted you back so I could hold you
I wanted you here beside me so I could love you

Inspired by Audio Adrenaline “Leaving ninety-nine” off the album Worldwide.

I am wounded and my sin is penetrating my soul like a bullet
Bleeding and trying to stop the pain that sin has caused me; using something that was dirty
I didn’t think I had much longer because I only had a minute before my life was altered
I didn’t want you to fix the source of my pain because it would mean you would have to reopen the wound to pour your cleansing blood upon me, on the cross bleeding, hurting, and wounded for my sake
I wanted to ask you to take the pain away but I didn’t want to listen to the answer you told me that you would help me heal.

I was shocked by your answer, once believing that my God would hurt me
I learned to cling to what was true, then I heard you tell me all I want is you
Thought I had my life figured out then it would take a deadly turn
Only to bring me to my knees and then I heard you yearn
I thought it was because you were in pain, I couldn’t even imagine that the tears you were crying were not yours but rather saw my own.

You told me that you’ll fight the fight with me. Didn’t understand the meaning of believing without seeing, when I get discouraged I hear my commander say “I am right here beside you”. I told you I had been shot and wounded, you somehow understood and felt my pain. When tears filled my eyes I saw that you were weeping, because I was hurting. You whispered words that have changed me “I love you my child” as you gently hold me. You have given me a future and forgotten what has past.

Inspired by Mark Schultz’s song Letters from war

I have been wanting to give you my heart
I have messed up so much, I didn’t know where to start
If life was a rose it would be thirsty
I have ran away from the living water my soul is parched
I didn’t mean to hide anything but you showed me everything
I had been keeping from you thinking that you were king of

I am giving you my withered heart
You have given me a taste of living water
You have given me a glimpse of your splendor
I had everything but you, but now I want nothing but you
My life was a testament of the prodigal son
your arms welcomed me into your family

I look for parallels in my life today, and how it was back then
It is then I realized that the Bible you wrote was for me
I was born blind, and now I am seeing was once dying
now I am living, was once in bondage to sin, but your
death paid the price and you showed me your message so freeing
I don’t know where I went, but you sought me out

Inspired by “Relient K’s” song “Deathbed” off the Album “Fivescore and seven years ago”.

When I am lost searching for the answers
I have been calling my voice is getting fainter
Yours is getting louder and I am looking
For something for something that no one can explain

You belong to me, your my child and I am holding your heart
Within my palm, is your weary and battered soul
My heart beats with love as your tears fill my eyes
I hurt for you my child, and I want to heal your pain

Can’t you see my child, within my eyes of compassion
a reflection of my love, a testament of my grace
A representation of mercy and eternity
A heart with a radiance that has set you free when I see your face

I don’t know how you have taken away the bondage that had entangled me
You did it for me on Calvary, and it was so you could be with me
I want to be all you have made me to be, but sometimes I lose my focus
I look at the waves, like Peter and become afraid

Inspired by “Mercy Me’s” song “Never Alone” off the Album “Undone”

I ask myself myself the question, am I worth fighting for Having nothing left to give, with my heart torn to pieces Feeling like the night’s darkness has engulfed me Is there hope for me, am I really worth fighting for Thinking that I am trying to step through a closed door Tired and weary of where my own efforts have gotten me You told me on Calvary, you’re what I’m fighting for So why do you question my everlasting love for you It is then that I realize that your plan is bigger than mine You told me with your tears, that you loved me with an undying love Your blood spoke to me and said you’re what I’m fighting for There is no reason I wouldn’t die for you my child So I will never again doubt the reason that I am alive because you have told me that, it is you I am fighting for Going to sleep with my mind blurred from the events of the day Tears filling my eyes with thankfulness, that I have the assurance that I am worth it When I think of your unfailing love for me, it fills my heart with joy The core of my soul is warmed by your grace, and it overflows my life

Inspired by Mark Schultz’s song “Letters from War”

Another trial in my life…another day filled with questions
Trying to sift through the confusion…looking for the answers
A hope that is real I am trying to grasp…I try to reach but I grab a handful of air…
Trying to hold onto something…Coming away with nothing…Conversing this desertland while my throat is parched…scorched and thirsty for water…

I try to hold onto hope…Jesus you are my hope…I know my hope will never let me go…
My heart gets tired…from crying tears of pain…but I know there is hope out there somewhere…I have trouble getting past my fears…but you bring me near…when I cry out for you to save me…Praying for something to happen…but I get so discouraged sometimes…I forget what I need to ask for…But my life is secure…knowing my Jesus is bigger…than my my circumstances…

Jesus I know you answer my cries…but sometimes it is hard to listen…when you tell me things…that are hard for me to hear…the deeper things in my life…the truth remains the same…regardless of my past…You give me something I can reach for…Jesus you are my hope…when the things of this world seem hopeless…I reach for the light switch…to try to make sense of the darkness…but I lose my step and hold onto your hand as you lead me…

You are my hope…for my future…your life has spoken mercy…over my life…the grace you gave to me on the cross…I am trying to take it in…a love so rich…so full of tenderness…so unconditional that nothing can separate me…from the place you have me…as I reach help me to take your hand…I rest in your never failing promises…as you help me to rest…put me to sleep in your arms…

Inspired by Jason Patchett’s song “Home” off the Album “Are you ready to go”?