Written at a time when I want to be full of life but right now it doesn’t feel like that’s possible.
Could it be this is how the rest of my life is going to go…is it possible that some day things will get better…because to be completely honest with you…ill believe it when I see it…because it has been so hard to get the help I need…my medicines need adjusted but haven’t had a doctor yet…who could help manage them…
My body it feels like it’s stopped responding…to the medication…when does it mean that I need to try something different…when is enough enough…I am glad that I will keep trying to get an appointment…hopefully this doctor can help me…I know it will be a long road…because I know that I have been hurting for a while…
You created me to be full of life…right now it’s a struggle because I just don’t feel it…is my fault or is it the choices that I’ve chosen to make…the steps that I am taking…will they continue to destroy me…or will they bring healing to my soul…it’s hard not knowing if you’ll see the brighter days…
Make full of life again…as I learn what it means to trust you more…what it means to put my faith in you…no longer trying to live this life on my own…but trying to move forward with your hand to guide me…restore my soul…so that I may see the light…this tunnel is so dark and it is getting longer…
Hoping with you. Full of hope because you’re trusting the One who hears and cares and goes ahead of you…even when that tunnel is so dark and looks longer, maybe there is going to be light, coming from around the bend. Even though we can’t see yet.